SIGH… watching my baby brother even sad is fucking depressing. You know that feeling watching a little child see someone older in pain. And knowing the fact that they know they are hurting in the inside. Shit just fucking hurts you so much :’/ Ugh grandma……No disrespect to you but dam I don’t want to see you like this. But its not stopping me from coming over to see you every night. What scares me the most is that what if something happens to you and I’m not there. I’ll be at school or something. I just wish I can be with you every second. But can’t cause school. But knowing the pain your in fucking sucks ass. I wish I can help you. I wish it was me instead of you. To see you suffer hurts me so much. I’m praying for you like always from day one. I love you so much. Every time I visit you, You don’t wake up. All you do is sleep :’/ will you ever wake up? I want to see those beautiful eyes one more time. I’m not begging you too, because I know your in pain. But the fact that you don’t talk, don’t eat, don’t wake up. I’m so scared you won’t get the nutrients to need. And that’s more scary because… well you know what happens grandma. I know you hear us when we talk to you. why? member last night? when we gave you water? something was telling us you wanted water…we gave you water and you didn’t even wake up. We didn’t even know if you were going to swallow it. I started tearing up again because you didn’t even move. We waited… then all a sudden you closed your mouth & drank the water. We were so happy! :’) cause we knew even though you didn’t talk or anything you were still with us <3 We love you so much for being so strong for us and not only us but for yourself grandma<3 and that makes us so proud of you! Cause your fighting for your life but don’t worry we are right beside you, we love you so much<3
(via illrememberyewforever)
